Delay Spray

If you want to overcome premature ejaculation, one product you’ll likely see promoted is something called delay spray.  There are many different brands of delay spray, and you may also hear delay spray referred to as “premature ejaculation spray,” “last longer spray” or other similar things, but the principle behind its use is the same.  The idea is that if you tend to ejaculate too quickly, you may take longer to ejaculate if you are able to numb the sensation in your penis a bit.  Delay spray accomplishes this by coating your penis in a thin layer of anesthetic spray.  This deadens sensation in your penis, so it takes you longer to get stimulated and have an orgasm.

If that sounds unpleasant, that’s because, well, it is.  The whole point of sex is to have fun and enjoy pleasure, so why would you want to deny yourself pleasure for the sake of sex?  It’s counterproductive.  If you aren’t enjoy stimulation, then you’re really denying yourself the point of the whole activity, and that means you’re wasting your time.  Worse, delay spray also gets inside the vagina and can deaden sensation for your partner.  So not only do you have less fun, but your partner has less fun too.  So if your sex life is bad now, using delay spray could just make it worse!

Delay spray has other drawbacks as well.  The most prominent is that perhaps a quarter of men who use the spray complain that they develop irritation from using the spray.  This can include burning sensations or rashes.  One quarter is a lot of men, so on the whole this is a pretty bad track record.  Women can develop rashes and irritation too, so this is no fun for your partner either.  Why put yourself through this?
Another reason that you probably don’t want to use delay spray to deal with premature ejaculation is that it treats the symptom and not the cause.  If you want to last longer in bed, using a spray isn’t really going to solve your problem, which is likely psychological at root.  Relying on a spray to sustain your sex life isn’t necessarily going to do wonders for your self-esteem.  And if you don’t feel good about yourself and don’t feel like you’re capable in bed, you’re going to probably build up additional anxiety or depression around the issue, and you may start to feel like you need the spray.

Alternatives to Delay Spray

So those are all the reasons you may want to avoid delay spray to resolve premature ejaculation.  Now that you know what you don’t want to do, what should you do?  Your next thought may be to take a medication, but this has many of the same drawbacks as delay spray including possible unwanted physical and psychological side effects.  And like delay spray, it doesn’t actually solve your problem.

The best alternative to delay spray is to solve your problem yourself.  How much do you currently understand about premature ejaculation?  This is something which in our society has been turned into an issue of paranoia, self doubt, and unrealistic expectations.  Men in our society are taught contradicting things.  They’re told that they need to be able to last a long time in bed, but they’re also taught to think of sex as a fast route to an orgasm and not as a world of experience which can include many activities.  These two ideas don’t really work together.  You can’t last long in bed if you’re just trying to get to the finish line.  These learned behaviors are cognitive and they can be unlearned.  Genetically as a man you’re probably also predisposed to getting it done quickly, but this is not likely a permanent part of your sexual identity, and can be overcome with effort.

So how do you actually treat your premature ejaculation on your own and last longer in bed without delay spray or medications?  First and foremost, you can change your attitude about the entire situation.  Premature ejaculation almost never has a medical root.  So you shouldn’t look at as some kind of medical condition because it’s not.  It’s psychological in the vast majority of cases.  Psychological factors like depression and anxiety can play into it too, in particular performance anxiety.  So drop your unrealistic expectations of yourself.  You’re not going to last long without putting effort into it, but you probably will last longer if you try.

Once you’ve taken a more positive outlook on your situation, you can start dealing with the possible causes of the issue.  Are there problems in your relationship which are causing you to have difficult with intimacy with your partner?  If so, you need to work them out.  If you have anxiety or depression about other issues in your life, taking care of those issues can help.  Also change your outlook on sex.  If you’re used to racing to the finish line, slow down and enjoy the scenery.  Sex is fun, and if you’re not having fun, you’re taking it too seriously.  It’s not something to torment yourself about.  Focus on having a good time with your partner and not so much on having an orgasm or thrusting into her as long as possible.  There are other activities you can try like oral sex which are fun and which may enable you to last longer.

Finally, there are concrete physical things you can do to improve your performance.  You may want to try out Kegel exercises, which are workouts for your pelvic floor muscles.  With these exercises you can actually strengthen the muscles which are involved in ejaculation.  This can boost your level of control and not only help you to last longer, but also to have harder erections and more intense orgasms.  There are plenty of ways you can improve your sexual performance and have a better time with your partner as opposed to using a product like delay spray which is likely to make your sexual experiences less satisfying.  Try changing your perspective and working out your pelvic muscles and see it if helps!