Men often complain that they don’t get enough oral sex, but when you
actually get your partner to go down on you, how do you ensure that you
won’t spoil it by coming early? This is especially likely to happen if
you’ve been waiting a long time for a blowjob and have built a lot of
anticipation around it. The last thing you want is for the experience to
be over right away. Here are some ideas to help you last longer during
your blowjob.
The fastest way to an orgasm is usually through repetitive motion,
so one way to make it less likely you’ll come early is to ask your
partner to change pace as she sucks you off. The changes in rhythm will
make it less likely that you’ll have an orgasm right away.
Another
quick route to orgasm is through pressure. The more pressure your
partner uses, the more likely you’ll come early. So if you think you’re
in danger of coming too soon, ask your partner to use only her mouth and
not her hands. It’s more difficult to exert pressure with the mouth
than the hands, and the mouth is less precise as well. This will make it
easier to last longer. If your partner has difficulty with this
instruction, ask her to touch other parts of your body instead.
Use
the stop and start technique. This technique is usually recommended for
sexual intercourse for men who experience premature ejaculation. You
can use it just as well though to avoid premature ejaculation when
you’re having oral sex. Interrupting the action every couple of minutes
(or less, depending on how premature you are) can help you to draw out
the experience. That doesn’t mean you have to interrupt the whole
experience, though; you can take a few minutes to focus on stimulating
your partner, or have her do something else to you.
Encourage
your partner to explore. There are many pleasurable sensations that can
be derived from the other sensitive areas around your genitals, not just
your penis. Many men enjoy having their testicles, anus, or inner
thighs stimulated, and not just their penis. You’re less likely to have
an orgasm from these more indirect sensations, however, so you may last
longer while also enjoying a more complex range of sensations.
Try
focusing on your partner. If you’re trying to get your partner off, you
may distract your mind enough not to have an orgasm as quickly. One
idea is to go down on your partner while she goes down on you in the 69
position. There are actually many different positions for fellatio and
for combining fellatio and cunnilingus. Different positions can also
help you overcome premature ejaculation simply by varying your
experience.
Try Kegel exercises. These are exercises for your
pelvic floor muscles. If you can stop and start your stream of urine
while you’re going to the bathroom, you already know how to contract
your pelvic floor muscles. Try doing sets of these contractions each day
(not while you’re urinating). You don’t need to go overboard with it.
Just a few sets of ten each day will help you to gain more control over
the muscles which are also involved in your orgasm. The more control you
have, the easier time you’ll have holding off your orgasms. This goes
for oral sex as well as intercourse.
Try round two. It’s typical
to last longer on a second round than you do on your first. This
applies to oral sex as it applies to intercourse. You may come quickly
the first time, but if you wait a bit and then try again, you may well
end up lasting a lot longer.
You’ll notice that a lot of these tips
for prolonging oral sex depend on your partner’s activities and not just
your own. If you haven’t learned how to communicate openly with your
partner during sex, now is the time. Don’t just have your partner go
down on you and then just stand there (or lie there, or whatever). Give
your partner feedback and suggestions and requests. If you want her to
stop using her hands, or you want her to explore different areas of your
body, then tell her so. Don’t just expect it to happen on its own. Your
partner doesn’t know what you need or want unless you communicate about
it.Premature ejaculation is a very common problem, and if you
are plagued by it, don’t make the mistake of thinking that you’re alone
or that you’re somehow deficient. More men than not experience
premature ejaculation. Try not to build up anxiety around it or think
that this reflects badly on you. It just means you need practice lasting
longer and can benefit from trying new things. While oral sex is often
recommended as a technique for avoiding premature ejaculation during
intercourse, oral sex can be an end unto itself, and you can still
experience the same problem with oral sex as you do with intercourse. So
don’t get down on yourself if you do. Just work on improving.
You may also notice that many of these tips also depend on adjusting your mindset about sex. For a lot of people, sex is all about getting to an orgasm. Orgasms are great, but they are the natural result of stimulation and arousal, and will generally happen on their own if you just enjoy the moment. They’re less likely to happen quickly and curtail the moment though if you don’t think of them as a “goal” during sex. Your body tends to go where your mind leads it, so if you are thinking about having an orgasm, you’ll likely have one sooner. If you’re just thinking about different sensations and exploring your sexuality with your partner, you’ll probably last longer. Chances are good that your orgasm will be more explosive and memorable when it does arrive too.
You may also notice that many of these tips also depend on adjusting your mindset about sex. For a lot of people, sex is all about getting to an orgasm. Orgasms are great, but they are the natural result of stimulation and arousal, and will generally happen on their own if you just enjoy the moment. They’re less likely to happen quickly and curtail the moment though if you don’t think of them as a “goal” during sex. Your body tends to go where your mind leads it, so if you are thinking about having an orgasm, you’ll likely have one sooner. If you’re just thinking about different sensations and exploring your sexuality with your partner, you’ll probably last longer. Chances are good that your orgasm will be more explosive and memorable when it does arrive too.
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