How To Stop Premature Ejaculation

There are few problems as embarrassing or hard to deal with as premature ejaculation.  You may be surprised however to learn that most men will have to deal with premature ejaculation at some point in their lives.  For some it’s a short-lived problem which only occurs once or several times, while for others it can be a long-term issue which needs work to resolve.  If you’ve just started to experience premature ejaculation and never had it in the past, it may be a temporary thing that will go away on its own if you don’t build up anxiety around it.  If it’s a long-term problem however, there is still plenty you can do to stop it.

Why Premature Ejaculation is Common

Why is premature ejaculation everywhere?  One reason has to do with male genetics.  Your ancestors were men who were able to ejaculate quickly and pass on their genes to future generations.  Since natural selection favored this trait, that trait was passed down as well.  This is why on the whole men reach their climax more quickly than women.  More than three quarters of men stated during a famous research survey by Alfred Kinsey that they ejaculated within two minutes or less of penetration during sex.  Now that you understand the genetic basis for premature ejaculation, you can also see why it’s so common.
There are other common causes of PE as well, many of them the result of social conditioning.  When you were younger, was your sexuality repressed because you didn’t want to face embarrassing scenes involving the adults in your household?  Did you have to hurry when you were masturbating so you wouldn’t be caught?  Did you have quick sexual escapades with girls because you didn’t want anyone to know you were having sex?  If so, you may have learned to prematurely ejaculate.  Even though that time in your life may be over, you may still ejaculate quickly because your body still believes it needs to hurry.  You can combat this issue by learning to slow down and relax during sex.  One great way to start is to slow down while you masturbate.  Instead of rushing to have an orgasm, just take your time and see if you can last longer by taking short breaks or changing what you fantasize about.Sexual repression in general can cause premature ejaculation.  While men in our society are encouraged to have sex and be promiscuous, they aren’t encouraged to experience the full spectrum of sexual experience.  One form repression takes is the idea that sex should consist of sexual intercourse alone and that foreplay is a means to an end, if anything, and that women expect and want this.  In reality a large number of women actually prefer foreplay to sexual intercourse.  Other forms of sex play can also provide for a fun time, and men sometimes overlook this because they’ve been taught to do so.  If you’re not honest with yourself or your partner about your own sexual desires as well, you may find it difficult to enjoy a fulfilling sex life.  This can cause premature ejaculation.
Issues with a partner are yet another cause.  If you are having relationship problems, you may have a hard time finding your partner (or yourself) attractive, and may have difficulty connecting meaningfully during sex because you’re struggling to connect meaningfully in general.  Both men and women can experience sexual dysfunction as a result of repression or relationship problems.  Along with premature ejaculation, impotence is also commonly caused by these issues.Mental illness is also pervasive in our modern world.  Stress, depression, and anxiety can all make it difficult to maintain an erection and enjoy your sex life.  If you’ve had negative sexual experiences in the past (rape, or even just a lot of bad relationships), you can also come to associate anxiety with sex.  This can lead to premature ejaculation.  Anxiety about your sexual performance may be a cause all on its own as well without any anxiety or depression relating to anything else.

Solutions to Premature Ejaculation Abound

It can be easy to feel desperate when you want to fix something that’s wrong in your sex life and which makes you feel inadequate.  You shouldn’t feel inadequate though when you’re facing problems which are so common that most men will deal with them at one point or another in their lifetimes.  What you do want to do is seek an answer to your particular problem, and not resort to the many medications which are sold to men who are looking for a quick answer.  If you pursue a natural remedy to premature ejaculation instead, you can build confidence and find a more meaningful and permanent answer.
There are physical and psychological approaches to this issue.  Kegel exercises to strengthen the pelvic muscles are one of the most commonly recommended physical approaches.  These exercises are concrete and give you something to focus on which directly relates to your control of your ejaculations.  Other physical solutions include techniques you can use during sex like stop-and-start or the “squeeze” method which can help you last longer.  You can also try out new sexual positions and activities.
Psychologically you probably want to start reframing your perspective on your sex life if you think that repression, anxiety, social conditioning, or other experiences in the past may be impacting your sex life now.  If you feel repressed, you need to be honest with yourself about what you want in your sex life and honest with your partner.  If you have anxiety surrounding your sex life, you need to work out those issues and find a way to renew your sexual well being.  Premature ejaculation may be a common situation for men to find themselves in at some point or other, but it doesn’t have to be a permanent problem.  The preponderance of men report improvement after they work on treating their dysfunction through one or more of these methods.