Sex Talk Realness: Period Sex

Real men and women weigh in on gettin' down when Aunt Flo's in town. (That's CIA-invented World War II codespeak for "having sex while you're on your period.")

Have you had period sex before?
Man A: You betcha.
Man B: Yup.
Woman A: Yes.
Woman B: No.
If not, why not?
Woman B: I've never had a relationship intimate enough.
Have you had it while in a serious relationship or a casual dating situation? Or both?
Man A: Both.
Man B: Only in relationships.
Woman A: Just while in my most serious relationship. My ex boyfriend wouldn't do it, but my current boyfriend does not give two shits about blood or anything gross, really.
Would you feel differently about it whether it was with a serious partner or a casual one?
Man A: Not at all, but the conversation is different when it happens. In casual sex and hookups, women have to (hopefully pretend to) be embarrassed and guys get this awesome, free declaration of valor and determination. "Oh, no, trust me: This is not a thing," we say, then we swipe our hair out of our face with a giant comb like the Fonz. Then we both start singing "Summer Lovin'" together.
When you're in a relationship, the woman usually handles it with a hardened, cool resolve. It's usually a, "This is going to be messy. Just letting you know if you just did the sheets." It becomes a logistical problem, revolving solely around laundry.
Man B: No.
Woman A: Mmm, maybe. I'm not really a casual relationship type person. I probably wouldn't bleed on a stranger, no, just because I wouldn't want a stranger to bleed on me.
Woman B: I really think period sex requires a little more intimacy. Like, sex is already pretty weird/gross. Adding menstrual blood into the mix, despite the fact that it's totally natural, requires some actual feelings of "I like hanging out with you even when uterine lining is visible."

Men, would you be mad if she had her period and didn't tell you until you were already having sex?
Man A: No. Interesting choice. Potentially hilarious post-sex bathroom trip, but no.
Man B: Don't know how mad I could be having just been laid. I'd be upset if it looked like a murder scene or if I'd gone down on her. Just need to be honest when sex is involved.
Women, do you usually tell the guy you have your period before you have sex?
Woman A: Yes! It's polite!
Woman B: Hypothetically, because I haven't, but I think it's a requirement. You can't just surprise someone with a bloody dick. Not cute.
Men, would you go down on a girl if she had her period?
Man A: I have and would if requested (pro tip: there's not as much blood as penetrative sex, in my experience, for all the reasons you think), but it's messy and more visceral. Sometimes your face gets, uh, dabbed (not covered, like in a grindhouse movie, contrary to popular belief) in blood and that usually tends to turn off the recipient more than anyone. Seeing people's faces covered in blood is an overall bad experience.
Man B: Nope.
Women, would you ask a guy to go down on you if you had your period?
Woman A: Uh, no, that pushes it for me.
Woman B: I mean, I wouldn't ask, but I'd still require some kind of foreplay.
Women, have you ever asked a guy to have sex with you while you're on your period?
Woman A: Yes.
Woman B: No.
Women, if you have, do you feel weird or awkward doing it?
Woman A: [I used to] because my ex made me feel so shitty about it.
Woman B: I probably would.
How do you deal with a potential tampon-up-there situation? (Side note: One time a friend of mine was really drunk and about to have sex with someone, pulled out her tampon, spun it around by the string and threw it. It hit her computer screen and slid down. LOLOLOLLOLLL)
Man A: I cannot remember a time where a woman tried to sexily remove a tampon, and I'm glad that's the case, having read your story.Man B: Never knew this was a thing. I'd just assume if she has a tampon in and things are moving to sex she'd just go in the bathroom and take it out and then get back to the task at hand.
Woman A: Never happened to me!
Woman B: This is probably indicative of [America's] terrible sex ed system, but I feel like a tampon in and then a penis in would somehow risk some kind of a health thing? You just can't be treating your vagina like your satchel purse. One thing at a time.
Women, has it ever helped your menstrual cramps?
Woman A: Not really. [My boyfriend] likes to think it does. Like it's a cure.
How do you avoid both being covered in blood at the end? Do you put a towel down?
Man A: If we're thinking things through, yep, that's the way to do it. Also, I think it's a little bit less about trying not to get blood everywhere (let's interrupt this incredible activity with a procedural cleaning activity!) and more about having stuff on hand to make clean up easy. Have soap and water handy or hop directly into the shower afterwards. It's the easiest way to go.
This is also one of the only times shower sex isn't the worst thing on Earth. For reasons far too scientific for my head, it's a less friction-y experience.
Man B: I've done this, but prefer doing it in the shower.
Woman A: One time I was having sex with my current BF and I thought my period was over, and after sex we turned on the lights and were COVERED IN BLOOD. It was totally traumatizing. We had to soak the bedsheets in the bathtub. He pretended it was like, all cool, but even for my not queasy at all boyfriend it was a little much. I use the softcup now, which is AMAZING AND I HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT FOR PERIOD MAINTENANCE AND ALSO PERIOD SEX. Because you can have sex with it in and it prevents blood and ain't no thing.
Men, if you refuse period sex, do you expect a woman to give you oral sex or find other ways to please you during her period?
Man A: No. I'm not a monster. But if the girl is uncomfortable with period sex (this happens, by the way! These women exist!) and still wants to do fuck-around stuff, who is really in a position to decline?
Man B: Can't say I'd demand reparations because I want to fuck and she's on her period. If she wants to go down I wouldn't stop her but no way would I expect it. If I'm down and she's not I just handle my business.
Women, do you go down on him or give him a handjob more often than usual when you're on your period?
Woman A: Nah.
Woman B: I wouldn't say I would go out of my way. I have no problem giving oral the whole week and not getting anything in return - just on the basis that I have to be comfortable with the sex. And I like BJs. But if he was the type of guy to refuse period sex when I was into it, he's not getting anything